TumbleDweeeb

Emmitt Owens

Marty’s Quikmart

  • Chill n’Fill #43 (Book 2, Episode 9)

    Another Night at Chill n’Fill: The Culture Warrior, The Evangelical, and The Activist    So, Jennifer called in sick for the sixth time this month—”food poisoning” according to her text, though her TikTok suggests she’s at a political rally downtown. Whatever. More hours for me, Karlee, professional chaos coordinator and now apparently the unwitting referee Read more

  • Chill n’Fill #41 (Book 2, Episode 7)

    The Night of the Silent Breakdown, the Snack Commander, and the Law-Defying Fisherman    It was Wednesday night at Chill n’Fill, and I was halfway through my shift when the fluorescent lights flickered in that particular way that always gave me a migraine by midnight. Jennifer had called in “sick” again, this time claiming she’d Read more

  • Chill n’Fill: #39 (Book 2, Episode 5)

    The Night of the Cryptid Hunter, the Sock Puppeteer, and the Sleep-Deprived Physicist     My Friday night shift at Chill n’Fill was off to an even stranger start than usual. The one-eyed polar bear sign outside wasn’t just flickering tonight—it was pulsating in a bizarre rhythm that Bob insisted was “part of our new sensory Read more

  • Chill n’Fill: Episode #38 (Book 2, Episode 4)

    Chill n’Fill Chronicles: The Night of the Little Car Thief, The Local Ranting Man & Officers Looking    My Friday night shift at Chill n’Fill was officially entering the twilight zone. The one-eyed polar bear sign outside flickered rhythmically, as if winking at the parade of weirdness that was about to unfold. Bob’s “rebranding” of Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 22

    Spilled Coffee, Supernatural Seekers, and Late-Night Confessions    My Friday night shift at Chill n’Fill was off to a promising start. The one-eyed polar bear sign flickered less tonight—Bob had finally convinced the electrician to return and fix the wiring after three rescheduled appointments. The bear’s eyepatch now glowed a vibrant purple instead of its Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 21

    Dead City Nights, Reclaimed Labels, and Peeking Through    Jennifer called in sick again—this time claiming her “clock had a broken gear” which might have been vaguely plausible in 1875 but seems highly suspect in our digital age. I’m starting to think she has a secret life as an international spy, given her increasingly creative Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 20

    Limitations, Lamentations, and Lyrical Coincidences    Jennifer called in sick again. This time her excuse was that her “goldfish blew bubbles” which is either some elaborate euphemism I’m not hip enough to understand or the weakest excuse in the history of employment. Either way, I’m covering her shift for the eighth time this month. At Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 19

    The Card Hunter, The Minister, and The Modern Shaggy    Jennifer called in sick AGAIN. This marks the seventh time this month, which I’m pretty sure qualifies her for some kind of absenteeism world record. Today’s excuse was “car troubles,” which is both entirely plausible and completely suspect given that she used the same excuse Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 18

    Profanity, Politics, and Paranormal Activity      Jennifer called in sick again with what she claimed was “a severe case of food poisoning,” which is either genuinely unfortunate timing or the most transparent excuse I’ve heard since my roommate said our cat deleted our rent payment. Whatever. More questionable night shifts for me, Karlee, professional sarcasm Read more

  • Chill n’Fill Episode 17

    Seek and You Shall Find, Darkness Falls, and Worried Masterpieces    I arrived for my Wednesday shift at Chill n’Fill to find Bob wrestling with our one-eyed polar bear sign again. This time, he was carefully attaching what appeared to be a tiny telescope to the bear’s remaining good eye. The sombrero had been removed… Read more