TumbleDweeeb

Emmitt Owens

Poems

  • Flossin’ (With Welding Wire)

    Flossin’ (With Welding Wire)A Multisyllabic, Whimsy, Stream of Consciousness RhymeBy:Emmitt Owens(Index #01032026) [Verse 1]In the age of alarm clocks, I missed the cueHit snooze on myself, let the weird come throughStatic in my bloodstream, dial-up soulTryna download peace on a cracked flip phone Pajama-pants swagger, Jordans feel newSlingin’ spaghetti out the window of my confused… Read more

  • Low-Rent Majestic

    Low-Rent MajesticA Multisyllabic, Whimsy, Stream of Consciousness RhymeBy: Emmitt Owens(Index #01022026) [Hook]I don’t need approval, I need better decisions My conscience got evicted for unpaid supervision I wake up like “damn, still me?”—that’s persistence Every bad idea got my full cooperation  No halo, no villain arc, just friction Too weird for the normies, too broken for tradition If this goes… Read more

  • Parenting 101

    Parenting 101A Stream of Conscience, Comedic, Multisyllable RhymeBy: Emmitt Owens(Index #01012026) IntroAlright—hold up…Sound check crackling like my last relationship.Fair warning upfront: This gets weird if you’re sober or expecting common sense. Verse 1I’m infectious with sentences, diction got pestilence,If you clap back, pack proof and some penicillin in.I overcook metaphors, choke jokes twice,Trip over punchlines,… Read more

  • Rest in Peace: 2025

    R.I.P. 2025 By: Emmitt Owens (Index #12302025-8:07am) Diddy’s baby oil stash went from bathroom accessory to courtroom exhibit, and the whole internet got LUBED, MOISTURIZED, AND SIDE-EYEING EVERY SHINE Suddenly nobody trusted a glow, a gloss, or a man with “good skin.” Taylor Swift got engaged to Travis Kelce and that announcement PENETRATED DEEP—timelines expanded,… Read more

  • A Tuesday Poem

    A Tuesday PoemBy: Emmitt Owens(Index #12302025) Tuesday weighs heavy like wet wool, this day that pretendsto be productive but really just slouches between the bookends—and I’m thinking about how we’ve built this elaborate theaterwhere everyone’s both audience and performer and no onecan remember their lines but we all keep showing up anyway,swiping left on our… Read more

  • The Bug, I Didn’t Remove

    The Bug I Didn’t RemoveA Whimsy-Whirly, Topsy-Turvy, Tale of Delightful NonsenseBy: Emmitt Owens In two-thousand-seventeen, so the story goes,Everyone was keeping score with their…fingers and toes! Of a game nobody wanted, a game with no rules—I said, “I won’t play!” and they thought “he’s a fool”. Ten years before that (or was it eleven?)I found… Read more

  • A Poem Disguised as a Rant Disguised as an Essay Disguised as a Tuesday.

    Tuesday feels like everyone’s got a checklistof thingsthat shouldn’t bother thembut doHoward wrote three posts this weekabout baseball caps facing backwardThree separate postsSame capSame complaint.Same energy of a man who says“I just keep scrolling”while absolutely…not keeping scrollingInstead…He stopsHe has to post about itHe has to post about howthe plastic strap bothers himThat little adjustable piecestretched… Read more

  • Pleasure Without Depth is a Lie

    Pleasure without Depth is a LieEmmitt Owens(Index #09272025) The mind is a weather pattern… shallow breezes, deep currents, and the strange silence before lightning. Emotion doesn’t ask permission.It floods, it carves, it reshapes.Identity isn’t fixed… it’s sediment, washed and rewritten by every wave. To fear intensity is to fear color.To flatten experience is to bleach… Read more

  • The Signal in the Static

    The Signal in the StaticBy: Emmitt Owens(Index #09122025) Oh, look what crawled through the ethernet cables today—your little transmission—blinking at me like a confused lighthouse that’s forgotten which way the shore is supposed to be. And here I am, cosmic radio operator extraordinaire, having to tune into your particular brand of “scrambled frequency” because apparently… Read more

  • Tuesday in My Brain

    Tuesday in My BrainFor My Grandchildren: Silas, Elijah & Theo(Index # 09112025) In the town of the teapots I painted a shoe,With pickles for buttons and some glittery glue.I danced with a doorknob, I sang to a chair,I juggled three penguins while brushing my hair.Pull the moon backward and tie it with shoestrings,With a bubblegum… Read more